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Decisions, Decisions

Isaiah 55:8-9 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.  As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

I’m sitting here watching the sun come up early on this Saturday morning.  The kids are with their Dad and the apartment is still and quiet.  Too quiet, almost.  Quiet is good, though, as I listen and wait expectantly on God to speak to my situation.  I have been troubled for several weeks now by a matter that would seem to many to be trivial, but it is HUGE to me.  The hardest part of all of this is that I cannot discuss it with anyone, and yet, that’s the best part.  Huh, you say?

You see, I have had no choice, but to pray to about it.  I have said, “God, I can talk to no one else on this planet.  I have to talk to You.  You have to help me with this for it is only You Who can fix it.”  He hasn’t yet, but He is faithful and He will. I know He will.

I feel as though I am in an all out war.  Good vs. evil; truth vs. lies; emotions vs. knowledge…for what I know to be true can be jumbled when emotions get involved.  Paul’s illustration in 1 Corinthians 13:12 is on point: 

“Now we see things imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.”

So, at the beginning of day 2 of this weekend of soul searching, God-seeking prayer and fasting, I can say, “I don’t know why.  I don’t when.  I don’t even know how, but I do know WHO!”

Romans 11:33 “Oh, how great are God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge! How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his ways!”

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